you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Randomize
