omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
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