Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
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