after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
Randomize