Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
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