Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
Randomize
