I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
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