this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
is wine microwaveable?
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
