omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
Randomize
