i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
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