I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
