I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
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