yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
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