she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
Randomize
