Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
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