: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize
