For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
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It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
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