i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Randomize
