You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
Getting a high five from your dog when you're stoned is one the greatest rewards of being a pet owner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
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