are you still at the devil's house?
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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