New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize
