Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
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