@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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