I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
it was like eating out sand paper
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...