I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
