what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
Best part of being a cop: When I showed up at Thanksgiving with stitches in my head I could tell them I was "protecting and serving" not "drinking and falling down". Career validated.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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