Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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