You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Randomize
