You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
