I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize