when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
