If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
