....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
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