If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
Randomize
