Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
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