It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
