i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize
