I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
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