why did i wake up with a kid named Raphael in my bed this morning?
I dont know but you did call last night to tell me you found the last ninja turtle
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
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