Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
