You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
and i looked up. we had an audience...
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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