Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
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