i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
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