K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
Randomize
