Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
I think pants incapable of making pants work
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize
