I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
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