I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
