wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
