You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
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She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
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I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
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