Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize
