at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
