Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
Randomize
