the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
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